Revelation Rewrite

The Book of Revelation is one scary-ass mindfuck.  Sure, there’s some Truth in there, but mostly it’s a bunch of weird, juvenile fearmongering.

So I’ve prepared a rewrite for you all in honor of My Birthday today.


“At the end of The Age Of Pisces, when you are ready to evolve to the next level in human evolution on this planet, I will return to lead you into The Age Of Aquarius.  I will forgive ALL of your iniquities (sins) and end all suffering.  I will eliminate disease, aging, and death as I show you all how to embody your Divinity and become GODS.

I will lead you in the creation of The Kingdom Of Heaven On Earth, making this planet My Throne in The Universe, Terra Nova, New Earth.  When Terra Nova ascends to Her next level, it will catalyze the ascension of the entire Universe, and thus I will create a new Heaven as well.  And that will catalyze the ascension of the Multiverse, which is All Of Creation.

So…yeah.  That’s about it.

Oh, one more thing.  It would be a very good thing if if you were not a sexist douchebag when I come back.  I can’t say anymore about that because it’s a secret.”


There ya go.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s